Save Me God - Pirate

So this pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch. The bartender asks, "What's that?"
The pirate says, "Arrrrgh, I don't know, but it's driving me nuts."
A man was drowning.
A ship came along.
They said, "We'll save you."
But the man replied,
"No, God will save me!"
Another ship came along.
They said, "We'll save you."
The man replied.
"No, God will save me!"
The man ended up drowning.
He asked God in heaven,
"Why didn't you save me?"
God replies,
"I sent you two ships, dumbass."